For most of my life, I’ve been blonde. I remember feeling ultra fresh the first time I had highlights put in at a salon in my teens and from there on in, I was hooked. I’ve been just about every shade of blonde one could hope to achieve and always felt happy when I looked in the mirror. I had two stints when I had dyed my hair brunette, but never felt like myself and quickly went back to blonde (much to my hairdressers dismay as going from one-extreme to the other can cause some serious damage if done too quickly).
For the past year, grey hair has emerged with a vengeance: it was something different, edgy, and out of the ordinary. I remember walking behind a woman in the parking lot months ago with grey hair and was shocked when she turned to reveal a 20-something face. The contrast was striking and something I found myself wishing I could pull off. I’m just not that daring. I was always the friend that would endlessly bother her friends with questions of hair colour changes. All of them were sweet in entertaining my questions and ideas knowing full well nothing would change when I went to the salon. I was a blonde through and through.
I’ve recently been on a crusade to change my hair to a crisp, platinum white blonde. I’ve always been obsessed with that shade. While I’m close to achieving that, last time in the salon, my colourist told me she was going to leave the toner on my hair a little longer in attempt to kill any golden elements I had left in my hair (part of the journey of achieving a white/blonde). The result when she washed it out was a beautiful, light silver.
Cue my heart racing. I was filming a few days later and thought, “there is no way I can look like this on camera.”
I was panicking. What the hell was I thinking? Why on earth did I think this was a good idea? I mean, I wanted to do this shade, talked about it, dreamt about it, but had shoved that thought aside as I’m not daring. After-all, this is what people on Instagram do, not professionals, right?
Despite my fear and initial panic, while my hair was being dried I was internally squealing about how bad-ass I felt. My hair was shade I never thought I could pull off or would have dared done in fear of what others may have thought; clients, friends, family, etc. But you know what? I tell my clients to try something new all of the time if they’ve always wanted too, and now, it was my turn. I loved the idea that it was something I LOVED and knew that not everyone else would. I was okay with that. There’s freedom in following what you love and not caring what others will think. While hair may be a small example of how that can be achieved, for someone that is typically a scardy-cat with her locks, it was a powerful moment for me.
Since then, I’ve been finding myself experimenting with my fashion even more than I use too. Things I would have hesitated to wear, but drooled over in pictures are now inspiring me to be more creative in my day-to-day dress. Every time I put something together that’s more offbeat or ‘daring’ for me, I feel myself shift — I end up feeling more powerful, creative and happy during the day because I’m allowing myself to be me. Mental freedom is amazing soul food.
I’m writing this because throughout the day women tell me how they save special pieces or never wear others in fear of being judged or being too daring. Especially when shopping, I see the eyes of some light up when they see a special piece that’s “so them”, but quickly put it back while they tell me of someone who will pull their leg or give them an earful because of it. It’s disheartening to think that anyone in their life would block their joy.
So wear the bold colours, the special shirt, the quirky prints, or dye your hair a ‘crazy’ colour if it speaks to you. Your happiness is worth it.